hikari-the-human:

my avocado don’t

12:11 AM + 15930 + reblog
hikari-the-human text--posts

officialfrenchtoast:

"dinner is ready"

image

12:08 AM + 302583 + reblog
officialfrenchtoast best-text-posts

wwolfparty:

when you really hate the fuck out of someone but you cant say shit because everyone else loves them and you know deep down in your cold dead heart that they’re a terrible person

image

12:08 AM + 278918 + reblog

physicalvocalist:

fallen-angel-in-the-tardis:

lembas-and-cram:

concernedresidentofbakerstreet:

rendezvousramen:

addictedtopunsandpizza:

macaronivevo:

jesuschristvevo:

is it data or data

is it route or route

is it caramel or caramel

is it either or either

is it read or read

is it lead or lead

Maybe its Maybelline

I hate how any English speaker knows exactly what’s happening here.

12:06 AM + 501146 + reblog
jesuschristvevo best-text-posts

balanc3andcomposure:

things that make you feel powerful

  • matching lace underwear
  • heels (and the clicking noise they make when you walk and you know you lookin hot)
  • red lipstick
  • perfect coal black eyeliner
  • curled hair
  • freshly done nails
  • cute new clothes
12:06 AM + 150533 + reblog
balanc3andcomposure best-text-posts
A Simplified Guide To The Sexualities
  • Homosexual: sexual attraction to houses and other building like structures.
  • Heterosexual: an undying lust for Macklemore.
  • Asexual: attraction to any and all things beginning with the letter A.
  • Pansexual: a desire for pots, pans, and other kitchen utensils.
  • Polysexual: sexual attraction to polygons.
  • Bisexual: Attraction to the 9th century Chinese army officer Bi Shiduo.
  • Demisexual: Never ending love of demi lovato
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you-wish-you-had-this-url best-text-posts
-
Feminism is not about who opens the jar.

It is not about who pays for the date. It is not about who moves the couch. It is not about who kills the bugs. It is not about who cooks the dinner. It’s not even about who stays home with the kids, as long as the decision was made together, after thinking carefully about your situation and coming to an agreement that makes sense for your particular marriage and family.

It is about making sure that nobody ever has to do anything by “default” because of their gender. The stronger person should move the couch. The person who enjoys cooking more, has more time for it, and/or is better at it should do the cooking. Sometimes the stronger person is male, sometimes not. Sometimes the person who is best suited for cooking is female, sometimes not. You should do what works.

But it is also about letting people know that it is okay to change. If you’re a woman who wants to become stronger, that’s great. If you’re a man who wants to learn how to cook, that’s also great. You might start out with a relationship where the guy opens all the jars and the girl cooks all the meals, but you might find that you want to try something else. So try it."
4 ignorant delusions people have about feminism (via brutereason)
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dailydot.com best-text-posts

filthe:

no one cares if you don’t like short hair on girls shut the fuck up

12:58 AM + 418395 + reblog
filthe text--posts

agentwoshington:

agentwoshington:

ok but there was a bus filled with potatoes driving around my town today

image

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12:57 AM + 202472 + reblog
agentwoshington text--posts

alt-j:

why is James spelled with an s. why is it plural. more than 1 Jame. how many James.

12:57 AM + 326761 + reblog
alt-j text--posts

gnastly:

I smoked one alcohol and my left arm fell off

12:57 AM + 271962 + reblog
gnastly text--posts

twinkleofafadingstar:

number one pet peeve of all academia related to literature:

  • when men are characters but women are symbols
12:57 AM + 29355 + reblog
twinkleofafadingstar text--posts

dutchster:

why do shampoo bottles weigh hardly anything but when you drop them in the shower they turn into a meteor

12:54 AM + 261544 + reblog
dutchster text--posts

meatbicyclevevo:

mocking-scoutandjem:

meatbicyclevevo:

meatbicyclevevo:

What’s the definition of a will?

Come on guys it’s a dead giveaway

literally threw my head back in laughter and hit the wall

how did you throw your head it’s connected to you

12:52 AM + 196420 + reblog
meatbicyclevevo text--posts

princcess:

Overtaking someone on foot and having to keep up the uncomfortably fast pace until safely over the horizon

12:52 AM + 18488 + reblog
princcess text--posts